Oftentimes, when I look at my girls or think of them, a smile would readily brighten up my otherwise serious-looking face. Deborah, 6 and Rachel, 4 are two of God's many wonderful gifts to me.
Their cheerfulness and enthusiasm are second to none, and it takes tough stamina just to listen to them recount their daily adventures. They are always so infectious in their laughter, chattiness and excitement, and they are a pleasure to be with after a tough no-nonsense day at work.
Dedicated to God
Deborah and Rachel have been dedicated to God when they were mere babies. Veron and I believe in this as God gave these kids to us in the first place. We have absolutely no right to them, but are given the honour and privilege of helping raise them, and in the process, understand and appreciate better our relationship with one another and with God. It's been our prayer that both Deborah and Rachel will grow up to be women of Christ, women of great faith, women after God's heart. Having tasted how good God is, the only thing we desire greatly is for them to have Jesus as their friend and God for life.
The prayer we prayed
Yes. We know what we have prayed for. We know it's in fact akin to asking for troubles. Faith can only be developed through and exercised over adversities. This is evident in the lives of men and women of great faith mentioned throughout the Bible, and in my own. Did we ask for great faith in our children? Yes, we did, and we know it's the right thing to ask, along with wisdom, love, strength and courage. Since they accepted Jesus as their Lord and saviour 2 years ago, we know God has started working in their lives.
Faith-building begins
I have always believed that God will provide the best for my daughters. As a person with profound deafness in both ears, and having experienced firsthand the anguish and challenges of living with deafness, I prayed earnestly with Veron much earlier in our lives, that when God do give us children, they will be born with good hearing. God answered our prayers. Both Deborah and Rachel were born with good hearing and they developed speech and a love for music at a young age. In fact, both of them are so articulate and musically-inclined that one would never suspect that they might have hearing problems.
Papa, let me hear your heartbeat
Pre-bedtime is usually family time for us. We would exchange stories, pray, play, and chit-chat as a family. Last night, Rachel asked to hear my heartbeat. For some reason, I asked her after she did so, why she did not use her right ear to hear. She said it's very soft when she hears through her right ear. She then said that since the swimming incident, when she felt her ear blocked after the swim, her right ear has been blocked. I turned to Deborah, the older of the two, and asked if she can hear well with both ears. She was silent, shifted her gaze downwards & said nothing. I have noticed her cocking her head to her right occasionally when we communicate and that she tends to use the phone on her left ear. They haven't had any hearing tests but in my heart, I know something may be amiss.
When we prayed last night, this became our focus. We prayed for healing for both Deborah and Rachel. At the same time, we also asked God to further strengthen them physically, emotionally and spiritually as they grow. We would like to see them draw even more closely to God and learn to let His strengths take the place of our human frailties, so that they can walk triumphantly in life.
Life's ironies
Success isn't appreciated until one has failed. Joy isn't known unless one has experienced sorrows. There is no positive without the negative. There is no rainbow without the rain.
If I hadn't been deaf, I would have lived differently, but whether for better or for worse, I won't know because I haven't been there. One thing that I know for sure, I am a fighter and a winner despite being deaf, all because God is my teammate for life. All that I am, have achieved, and am capable of doing is really because of who God is and how He has worked through my weaknesses. And I am persuaded that I can walk closely with God only because of my frailties. Without these weaknesses, how would I have known God personally for his greatness?
The Lord is My Shepherd (Psalm 23)
The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.
Press on, Deborah and Rachel. God has been gracious to me and He will be to you. May the Lord be with you always.
Love,
Papa
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